CSI: American Carnage (Tuesday, June 9, 2020)
WASHINGTON – There is a loud crack from the rear of the Executive Lounge as Stephen and Donald finish off two wild salmon platters with extra hush puppies and no slaw. Stephen glances toward the back of the lounge where the mold has now filled the entire space and is pressing hard on the translucent polycarbonate shield installed by Hector, before the protests. Donald says, It’s fine. Nothing can break through the shield. Stephen says, Absolutely not. Donald says, We may use Hector’s shield down on the square. Stephen says, Oh? Donald says, Yeah, we’re gonna try and goose the scum on the streets, goad em a little, and Bill thinks it’s a pretty good idea to get the shields in place. Stephen says, Goad the protestors? Donald crams another hush puppy into his paper cup of tarter sauce, which then squirts down the side of the recliner, and says, Yeah. It’s great for the market. I heard that everytime a black with a name is killed, the market goes up. It’s just a direct relation. I heard that when MLK was killed the market spiked 3 percent. When the guy in LA, the other King, was taken into custody, even though nobody heard of him, nobody, but he was on the teevee with the video tape, this King was, it bumped the market 1.2 percent. Same with this Michael Brown, who was resisting arrest somewhere. With this Floyd George guy, we’re already up three and a half percent and counting. The Dow is soaring. Can you imagine if these peace officers took out another of the blacks or four or five? Six? We could be looking at the greatest market in history, which it already is, even greater than history. You got any more fries? Stephen passes his fries over to Donald who drops the box, scattering them across the floor. Stephen jumps up and sweeps the fries into a bag and hands them back to Donald. Donald scrapes up some tartar sauce from the side of the recliner and pops the fry thoughtfully into his mouth. He chews, slowly. After a moment, Donald says, It’s true, there is a direct tie, and I’m not just saying this, but many people have said it throughout history, in the past, there is a direct relationship between death and the stock market. Stephen says, Oh? Donald says, Look at what happened after World War Two, and you also have World War One, where they had the roaring 20s and then the pandemic, which Kudlow knows, and Navarro. Stevie, look, I know this stuff, it comes easy to me. I look at two or three, four different things and I understand it all, completely. After World Wars, where there were a lot of deaths, the market went through the roof. The numbers were fantastic. And we are topping that. The Dumb As Hell D’s don’t see the big picture, which is what you’ve got to focus on, Steverino — the more they die, the better the numbers. Lots of people know this, but only I can reap the reward. It’s our ticket for November, Stevie — let the virus run the table, egg on the blacks, send the army in, and watch what happens. Not only will you get the greatest numbers in the history of the Dow, you will get the highest ratings ever, beyond a doubt, in the history of the teevee, and not even some tin hatted general, some fat guy with a pea for a brain, can stop it, believe me, they will follow orders, because that’s what generals do, they follow orders. – Tuesday, June 9, 2020