CSI: American Carnage (Thursday, November 14, 2019)
WASHINGTON — Kellyanne says to George, who is watching a rerun of Taylor and Kent on mute, Honey, I can’t see a thing. I think I left the eyeballs in the bathroom. Can you be a sweetie and fetch them for me? George mutters something, gets up off the divan, and finds the eyeballs in the toothbrush cup. He brings them over and Kellyanne pops them in with a snap. She says, That’s better. Sugarplum, stay off the damn teevee. I can’t bear Wolf asking about our marriage. George grunts. Kellyanne says, The next thing is they’re going to bring out those nude pictures of the president and the girls peeing on the Steele dossier. I don’t think you should be faced with that. Let Devon handle it, okay? The president will be offensive, okay, and I don’t want you in the middle of it; that’s no place for a cuddle bear. George mumbles. Kellyanne says, I can’t hear a thing you’re saying sweetie. The ears, I don’t know, in the car, maybe? Look, just stay off tomorrow, okay? The president will be releasing the video, the one with Rudy taking the bag of rubles from Lev and passing it over to the president. They are going to make a big deal out of it. And when they do, we’ll have them, okay. They will fall right into the trap. It’s a terrific tape. Lev’s got the bills sticking out from inside. Cash money. And the president says we will do whatever it takes to get the gas license for you. It’s perfect. So I don’t think, particularly with the nude photo stuff, not us, by the way, just the president, I don’t think you should be on. Let me handle it. I know how to deal with the tape of Paulie, too. You don’t know enough about his great plan. The tape just gives a little hint – but they’re gonna go wild. I can handle wild, babe, much better than you because, no matter what they say, it didn’t happen. It’s not there. It wasn’t said. I know that’s true, and the president knows it’s true, but you? Not so much. – Thursday, November 14, 2019