CSI: American Carnage (Thursday, April 25, 2019)
SUNLAND NM — The ringmaster’s black eyes and rosy cheeks sparkle, in their way, beneath the bright spotlights. The Professor and the strike force sit, apprehensively, in the audience. They are the only audience in this theater arcade, now filling with hurdy gurdy music that veers off key and strikes an increasingly minor tone, a sprightly dirge. Little Timmy, pup reporter, whispers to the Professor, Maybe we should leave this place? It seems to be veering out of control. The Professor says, What control? Is there control? Only the law imposes control. The ringmaster over hears the comment. The room fills with more smoke and his eyes flash. He taps his stick and twirls it like a baton. He leaps and lands with spread legs. He tips an invisible hat and twirls a mustache that does not exist. His eyes spew smoke. The law? Legal? the ringmaster says. Was it legal? Am I a nice man? Fuck nice. They say terrible things about me in the Nation. Fuck the Nation. You want to be Nice, or you want to be Effective? You want them all to notice? You want them all to give? You want to get away with it? You want the top of the mountain? Follow me! He saunters down the aisle, twirling his stick. Timmy and the strike force rise and follow. The ringmaster is back out on the fairway. He points to an attraction named Plain Sight. It’s sign flashes on and off. It changes color from red to yellow to green and blue. Plain Sight. Plain Sight. Plain Sight. The ringmaster says, If you’re indicted, you’re invited. And if you’re not, there are ways. Follow me. He enters. Again it is another smoky room with a stage. But this stage is broad and deep. The strike force sits. The hurdy gurdy music rises. A disco ball begins to flash, casting red and rose and scarlet slivers of light. A strobe lends syncopation, chopping movement into bloody milliseconds. The curtain suddenly rises on an empty stage. A giant ematiated puppet made of sticks and straw drops down from above. The puppet says, Fuck you. The puppet says, Who the fuck are you? The puppet says, You got a problem? I can fix it. Who’s it gonna be? Don’t be shy. You wanna get clear, I can clear you. You want Chuck, I can deliver. You want Si, I can deliver. I bring out the worst. That’s my secret. You want out, we can talk. You want controversy? I can deliver? Tough? That’s my game. You got money? Money talks, bullshit walks. I don’t want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. That’s the story. Show me the money. Money. Money. Money. Money. Money makes the world go around. The strobe flashes faster and faster. The puppet bounces up and down. The hurdy gurdy tilts into noise, louder and louder. Timmy puts his hands over his ears. He shouts, Let’s get out of here! He runs from the room. — Thursday, April 25, 2019