CSI: American Carnage (Saturday, June 29, 2019)
SOMEWHERE IN KOREA – Donald says, Xi loves me, Stevie, he loves me. Don’t you think? Did you see how firmly he held my hand? I could pull him? Plus he has dry skin, very dry, maybe some kind of condition. Stephen says, He has dry skin, everyone is talking about it in Osaka. Donald says, Great city. I gave Abe some tips. You know, Abe thinks I am like Lincoln in a red hat. Lincoln who had so much Fake News™ to deal with, but not as much as me, nobody has been hated as much as the hate that they’re throwing at me. Abe said I’m greater than Lincoln, which I said, Mr. Premier, that is true, but I can’t say that because they’ll pound me, and he said, All of us know it. All of us, he said, to emphasize, you know. And Vlad said that the thing is use the jails, they understand the jails, and if that doesn’t work, he says we can do other things, and we talked a lot about that, and had some great talk, and I told him about how I’ve got Mar just waiting for him. There is a special room with some of my best stuff and I’m looking forward to showing him and playing the golf and he laughed! What a great guy, a tremendous guy, who is serious and respects me. Are we there yet? How much further is it? I’m thirsty. Gimme my diet coke, okay, this is taking too long. I’m bored. Do they have any cell service here? Lemme see my phone. Stephen hands Donald his cell phone. Donald says, It says no service. How can that be? How will I know Chairman Kim is there to greet me? What if he doesn’t show up? Or if he’s in the wrong spot? Stephen says, This is where he does it. We’re close. It won’t be long. Donald says, This sucks, and the women in the soccer meet are all losers, they’re just not as bad losers as the French who are terrible. Why do they call them frogs? Give me some chips. Do we have any chips? Why do we have to walk? I thought this fucking place was supposed to be cold, but it’s incredibly hot. Stephen says, It’s summer. We’re almost there. Donald says, They say Chairman Kim talks about me all the time. Everybody talks about me. What else are they gonna talk about? The Chairman is very smart, very intelligent, and he likes me, but there’s no cell service here, which is ridiculous, we can get them cell service, we can build lots of stuff for them, it’s such a great location, which Kim knows, he knows for sure, he gets it, but I want to know if he got my message, did he get it. Stephen says, Absolutely he got it. Of course he got it. When you send a message it hits its mark. Donald says, Chairman Kim is such a loving and beautiful young man, he is great, and so young and round and he has such beautiful skin and dark, dark eyes. – Saturday, June 29, 2019