CSI: American Carnage (Nov. 18, 2020)
“I will let Rudy make his pitch which is not a pussy pitch”
WASHINGTON – The teevee is on in the Executive Lounge, as it always is, and Donald stands in front of it, starring at the blur of white snow and images that bleed in and out. It is late at night and the mold from the back room, having broken through the unbreakable polycarbonate containment shield, is now spreading throughout the kitchen nook and sending rank tendrils into the teevee area. Donald looks at the teevee. He cocks his head, leans forward, he squints and rocks back. He says, I have won. There’s no doubt, no doubt. These judges with their hands and palms, their robes which are ridiculous, nothing about any of it is real because reality is its own show which is on now, on forever, and I am at the center, they are all reaching for me, which makes it all so simple because, and everyone knows it, I can grab them all by the balls, if they have any, which I doubt, and yank them all straight, which I can do at anytime but I will let Rudy make his pitch which is not a pussy pitch like all these pussies pitch in Michigan, where the pussies caved to the traitors and the thieves, or like Georgia where all the crackers are ghosts voting and nobody can even stop them, they let them all in, millions of ghosts marching to vote, all carrying signs, I am a Dead Voter Voting! right down the highway, and these morons don’t do nothing, they don’t do a goddamn thing. Donald falls silent. The blurry image on the teevee looks out at him. Donald says, You look familiar. I know you. The image congeals into a face and then dribbles apart, like spilled oil. Donald squints. A voice from the teevee says, You fucked up. You let that limp asshole get the nomination, when I told you, over and over, to get Bernie in there. Bernie’s a guy anybody can hate, or the dyke, Warren. Fighting this guy is like fighting a pile of soft shit. Nothing has any impact because it’s already shit. And it doesn’t matter that he left half his brain at the bake shop. Donald says, What are you talking about? The man is a communist. He’s got black blood. He’s not even there and he doesn’t even know where there is. He’s a complete loser. His kid’s a sucker. The voice says, The kid’s a killer. The kid’s sick. The kid’s a junky with sores all over his body, and it’s contagious. The kid’s a courier for the Chinese, he worked the virus beat. Sue, jesus christ. Sue. What the fuck is the law for? Donald says, Sue everybody? The image says, Why not? It will be the greatest legal fight in history. And, you know, you might win, and if you don’t in the first round, this suit will be a breeder. They’ll never be able to catch up with it. They’ll never touch you. Don’t fucking forget: You know how to handle breeders who touch you.