CSI: American Carnage (Monday, July 29, 2019)
BENEATH THE PLAINS — The Dark Ones continue to pour over the elder’s exceedingly rare 1749 edition of the Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure, which the younger brother has brought from the Vault of Vigorous Viewing to the Library of Licentious Logic. The younger says, My brother, I am disturbed that you find value in the deceptive behavior of the vassal Amash. While it is certainly true that children do not deserve to be caged simply because they are children, it is also true they have broken the law. Order is necessary for the smooth running of the system of acquisition and enrichment. The Gambler Showman may be misguided in his effort to impose order, but his instincts are true and fair. The elder is silent. After several moments he says, My brother, the exploits and pranks of the Gambler Showman have nothing to do with order, as you well know, plus they have apparently worked: While many have been absorbed by the plight of these so-called children, the Showman has finagled a budget that promises to steal a huge amount of our money, and not even his audience at the Fox News has noticed. This budget amounts to nothing but theft. The younger says, Of course you are right, my brother. This radical nationalist budget removes money from its rightful place in our pocket. Nevertheless, my brother, as a staunch believer in Freedom, I beseech you to take these threats to children seriously. The culture in fact hates children, and the Gambler Showman has elevated that hatred to an unspeakable level and he has created a state enforcement apparatus that would make Father ill. The elder says, Father would have ignored such issues, my brother. Remember he was like a laser in his acquisitiveness. His rapaciousness was and remains legendary. Remember how he sucked the Eastern Despot dry. Oh! Those were the days. With money, only a fool wears the glasses of ideology. The younger says, Then we must draw attention to this budget crisis or we are lost – we become complicit in stealing from ourselves. Remember: the Showman cares nothing about next week, he is only concerned with the next hour or two. We must act! The elder is again thoughtful. At last he says, Perhaps we can dispatch one of our emissaries to the town of, what is it? the town we have almost sucked dry? The younger says, Baltimore. Yes, says the elder, Baltimore. We can dispatch an emissary to Baltimore to calm the servi and focus their attention on issues of paramount importance, like the need to slash services to keep us in business. The younger says, The Council of Elders is clamoring for something more far reaching. They are concerned by the spread of the blacks. The elder says, I am shocked, my brother, shocked! The blacks are like the other humans. They are servi and deserve the opportunity to express gratitude as much as anyone. They are, it is true, expensive. The younger says, Can the Gambler Showman afford them? The elder says, I wouldn’t worry about that my brother, not at this point. – Monday, July 29, 2019