CSI: American Carnage (June 17, 2021)
Former President has begun writing the unfolding narrative of his presidency, as reported elsewhere, and “two of the biggest and most prestigious publishing houses have made very substantial offers which I have rejected,” he says.
“That doesn’t mean I won’t accept them sometime in the future,” the 45th president says, “as I have started writing the book. If my book will be the biggest of them all, and with 39 books written or being written about me, does anybody really believe that they are above making a lot of money? Some of the biggest sleezebags on earth run these companies.”
CSI can now report that we have obtained pages from Former President’s manuscript, which we are preparing to publish as a potentially newsworthy document. The Editors, in a statement, said that “we have obtained a substantial body of work by the 45th president and we are in the process of preparing this historical document for publication. At the present time we have launched the fact-checking phase of pre-publication. We will update readers as the process continues.” The pages in question, the Editors said, deal largely with Former President’s association with numerous celebrity women and their efforts to service him. Other segments cover his long and intimate association with the diminutive leader of North Korea, his “wild” adventures in Moscow, a number of contemplative bus trips with Billy Bush, the secret life of birds, the windy graveyard, truck driving, the meaning of light in globes that effloresce, and related matters.