CSI: American Carnage (Friday, December 27, 2019)
TO OUR READRS!
NEW YORK – The Editors of CSI: American Carnage are on special assignment exploring servers said to be located somewhere in and around the kitchen area of the Russian Tea Room in midtown Manhattan. It has been reported that the well-known noshery was on the receiving end of curious pulse transmissions emanating from within several large deliveries of beets, dropped off on Christmas Day in an area where servers are said to congregate, according to two sources familiar with beets. At least one source discounted the possibility that the pulse transmissions represented some kind of “errant probe” misdirected by assets seeking to deliver “the package” elsewhere. Erratic service could result from “most anything,” this source said. The regular report of CSI: American Carnage has been put on hold, the editors say, while they investigate. — Friday, December 27, 2019