CSI: American Carnage (Saturday, August 31, 2019)
IN THE CYBER – Watch out! cries the Professor. A massive tweet, slowly rotating in the air, lands at the mouth of the cave where Little Timmy, pup reporter, and his small strike force are seeking refuge. The group retreats deeper as the tweet bursts with vaporous force, sending noxious fumes skyward. Timmy says, Gosh professor that was a big one. The Professor adjusts his tie and removes his pipe from his jacket pocket. He says, Yes, Timmy, that was FALLOUT FROM IG’S SCATHING COMEY REPORT. Sarah looks at the shallow crater near the entrance of the cave. She says, Harmless, and to be expected. The Inspector General must have found no illegalities and no breach of classified information regulations, and has sought to damn the arrogant Comey anyway. Comey’s arrogance and prissy rectitude annoy the hell out of the autocrat. Boris, genial triple agent, says, If he ees so prissy, why does autocrat bother? Sarah says, The autocrat’s main goal is to undermine belief in everything outside of himself. No other actor, no institution can be allowed to persist. He is all. Only the autocrat and what the autocrat says and does can be relied on. A series of rat-tat-tats comes from beyond a grassy knoll outside of the cave. A gauzy image of the White House now floats at the top of the rise, its white portico gleaming in the sallow light. In front, a group of commandos rolls a large cannon-bearing platform into position. Timmy says, Gosh, Professor! It looks like they’re attacking the White House! What’s going on? Sarah says, The autocrat is conjuring up the prospect of a coup. Timmy says, Of course! Rifle fire breaks out and rockets explode over the hillock, bathing all in an acrid cloud. Ka-boom! rocks the ground. Mohammed, Timmy’s friend, says, This doesn’t seem too stable! I’ve never felt the ground shake from fireworks. The Professor says, This is The Cyber, Mohammed, anything can happen. Sarah says, This is all a production of the autocrat. His doing. His vision. None of it is real. But what he can conjure in people’s minds, that is the danger. He binds his cult, he sows uncertainty in the rest, he exhausts, he beclouds, he dances on a field of mud, he tricks, prevaricates, fantasizes. Boris says, He ees tripping. Sarah says, Exactly. He has tripped out on his own brain chemicals. A number of bomblets explode above the White House, showering sparks of anger. Great rolling thunderclaps rattle stones from the cave roof to the ground. The commandos ignore the growing chaos. The Professor says, I think he may have used the last of the serotonin. Sarah says, The dopamine is probably almost gone. The Professor says, God help us. What if he is packing a case of norepinephrine? — Saturday, August 31, 2019